I met Paul back in 2010 but we didn't really connect until 2012 when we started playing pool together on a Friday night. Paul was already a father to Caitlin whom was 10 and Charlie whom was 6 at the time of me meeting them. We enjoyed each others company and days out, which turned into holidays as a family. Cayton Bay was his favorite place though we did enjoy Blackpool also. 

I fell pregnant in 2014 during a difficult period, I'd changed jobs and living above a drug dealer causing no ends of problems at the time. Once the initial shock of the pregnancy had sunk in on both of us we began looking for a new home for a family. This came in the Nov and we started a new chapter. My life was complete March 10th I didn't need anything else, or so I thought lol. 2015 christmas Paul proposed to me and in 2018 we tied the knot with a simple affair but apt for Paul and I. I married my best friend and his family it was the best time. We had fall outs, fun times, date nights and worked hard. Paul worked for Longs of Leeds for 14 1/2 year and decided he wanted to be at home on evenings to ensure he had the time with his children so he made the move and went to Lawcris for 5 1/2 years. He loved it there it gave him life and work balance still doing what he loved, his childhood job of Lorry Driving just as his Dad was up to retirement.

2019 Aug Paul developed a cold and 3 week later the cough was still there. His mum and I nagged him to go to the doctors and he did twice they gave him antibiotics for a sever chest infection. We were now in end Sept and he still had a cough so he returned to the doctors whom sent him for a chest xray as his lungs were now clear from infection. This led on to a diagnosis of stage 4 Kidney cancer that had developed to the lungs. Our world was shattered as we knew it but we remained strong together ❤️.

Dec he began treatment immunotherapy and his chest cleared massively but unfortunately his kidney was so aggressive it continued to grew. On given this news Paul was so calm only saying "No point of this journey has been straight forward and I'm ginger what did you expect!"

2020 lock down happened and Paul was placed on  furlough while I worked from home and home schooled Kyle now 5 with the help from Linda (Pauls mum) and though this situation provided us time together we would never have had in the normal world Paul was no longer as active as he had been. Dec Paul spent a period of time in hospital isolated from his family until tea time christmas day. What an emotional time for all, the children were not expecting him home till later in December, but after many calls and texts he confirmed i could go collect him. Many happy tears that day and the best christmas present was having Paul home with us.

Paul hated being separated from his loved ones and that's what made him decide when the time came he wanted to be at home. I supported this whole hearted and would move heaven on earth so he could have what he wanted.

As a family and with the much needed support from Wheatfields Hospice this was achieved. They gave us support from the outset and nurses came to the house, Julie and Caroline from the palliative care team were amazing and my line of support Laura whom just listened when I needed. Looking back I don't know where any one involved got the strength to do what we did and just know without this service we couldn't have done it. They were 100% invested not only in Paul but in everyone there for him. How they do this when only one outcome is going to happen and then move on to the next they are very special people who need to be recognised.

May 2nd 2021 Paul took his last breaths leaving behind a Mum, Dad, Wife, Daughter 18, 2 Son's 14 & 6 and lots of Friends. If only our love could have saved him he would still be here with us. 

Some say I'm robbed of my happy ever after but actually Paul loved me for the rest of his life and I will carry him and our bond with me for the rest of mine till we meet again. 

More families need this care from Sue Ryder so if you can spare a pound or more please donate on  fundraising in Pauls name so other families can have the support and care they give in very much needed times.